Sunlight (and a little rainbow) filtering through drizzling clouds
It is April, and it is somehow still cold enough for long winter jackets and brightly colored puffers. The daffodils that had just bloomed along sidewalks at Wellesley shriveled once again as the winter chill edged back in between brief hours of warmth.
With barely a month left before the reading period and final examinations, I nervously watch my workload pile to post-Thanksgiving highs once again. Final projects, presentations, orals, and exams on the horizon worry me, but I know looking too far ahead will cause me unnecessary pains. I need to just sit down and get done whatever I can right now. I still couldn’t help it sometimes. Interspersed between my academics are trainings and credentialing processes for my summer internship (which reminds me, I need to get a work visa really soon), travel plans for brief vacations between school ending and work starting, and plans for the big move to the UK for a semester of study abroad. As I scramble to get ahold of all my documents, make doctor’s appointments, and arrange insurance, I would then glance back at my final project that remains dormant in my notes app and panic. I dip in and out of phases of worry, repeatedly reminding myself that I can get through this, that I just need to sit down and do things one at a time, that this rapidly growing To Do List will shrink a little with each day.
This seems like a cycle of isolation that many Wellesley students go through – being so swamped with work and life tasks that you inevitably isolate yourself in a library for hours on end, skipping meals or eating a sandwich on your way from one class to the next. Following my roommate’s advice, I carve out time for friends, for attending culture shows, for setting down my work and having fun, despite wincing at the thought of less time for my workload that is rapidly increasing.
For instance, last Saturday, I took up my friend Candice’s offer to go to Boston for brunch at a Tatte café. We chatted over our eggs and toast, catching up on our lives pre and post spring break, our classes, families, friends, summer plans – all the typical conversation topics between acquaintances that somehow become so fun to chat about with a good friend with discussion veering off on every tangent possible. After finishing up our brunch, we headed to the Boston Public Library to study. I had initially thought that, being with a good friend, I wouldn’t be able to get any work done. But surprisingly, most of us got a substantial amount of work done. Candice edited an entire vlog and showed it to me over dinner before we came back to Wellesley – she is a true videographer.
Just yesterday, I had planned to eat dinner with a friend – Maria. Her long hair is always in a tightly braided bun. A math and computer science wiz, she has so much more wisdom and patience than me despite being a year younger. We had planned to sit in Lulu from 5:00-6:00 for a quick dinner, but we ended up chatting until 7:30 PM, walking back to Stone Davis together while laughing about our cultural fusions and upbringings. It is a wonderful feeling to press pause on reality to sit down for a chat with friends. Sometimes I worry that I will return to Wellesley after study abroad and the friendships I have now would’ve changed. Yet, I know that as we all figure out what to do with our lives, what exams to take and what schools to apply to, our paths will inevitably diverge. I think I like the feeling of having a consistent routine for months on end, but I am also restless in that I could not stay in one place for too long without a change of scenery. I hope my friends and I could keep in touch, and that I could return to Wellesley next Spring and perhaps ask my friends to study with me in the Science Center on the weekends again.