“We’ll be a fine line
We’ll be alright”
I didn’t know that this would be my last blog post until this morning.
On June 5th, I posted my first piece on here. I promised myself to always write something authentic, trying weekly to explore such incredibly important aspects of my life in about 500 words (a word count I surpassed, every single week, without fail). I didn’t know exactly what I was going to write about, but I knew this summer would present its challenges for me as it has for all of us: personally, politically, physically, and emotionally. It was all of these challenges that forced me to grow through the last three months, and to share with you what was on my mind as I did.
This summer, I have seen those closest to me suffer losses, make compromises, and live in constant fear they would soon experience more of both. This summer, I have spent countless hours in conversations about what the rest of 2020 could look like, anxiously awaiting the next inevitable announcement that something else in our world has changed. This summer, I have realized that things never really stop changing. By today, I’ve spent eleven weeks writing for this blog (serendipitously, 11 is my angel number), and it is only now that I realize I’ve been working towards this conclusion all along.
I started the blog by introducing myself to you with a commitment to sharing my summer of growth with anyone who would take the time to read it. I then told you all how I got here, home, as I described all of the change that happened during the weekend of March 12th. As sociopolitical tensions rose in the U.S. and the real Black American experience was put at the forefront of everyone’s minds, I shared my thoughts about Juneteenth, July 4th, and prison abolition. Along the way, I explored my own life mission and my purpose, candidly stating that I didn’t quite know what they were yet. In the weeks I wrote about this, I learned the most about myself, my own goals, and my areas for growth. Last week, I solicited the help of the entire student body in creating our own version of The Wellesley 100, and I published a list of almost 500 things that make up what there really is to love about being a Wellesley student. This week, I’ve finally solidified what the rest of 2020 will look like for me on Wellesley’s campus, even though every plan I’ve made is suspended in the air, as light as breeze. But the uncertainty is as heavy as stone.
After eleven weeks, I’ve realized that everything I’ve written has revolved around one central theme: the only constant is change.
And coming to that realization has brought me so much peace. If things never really stop changing, then I, and you, and all of us, have yet to see our darkest hours. But we have also yet to see our brightest days. The Earth will keep spinning, and the sun will keep rising, and the waves will keep crashing. We will laugh again, and cry again, and one day, we will hug again.
So tell them you love them today, because you may not be able to tell them tomorrow. And if you’re able to tell them you love them tomorrow, then simply tell them again.
Believe there is beauty in the broken. Manage to find the magic in the mundane. There’s a fine line between them. Find it.
We have survived so much so far. We’ll be alright.
Thank you for reading, and all the love,
Tatiana