“Queer people are just like everyone else,” “There’s no ‘gay uniform’; they dress just like us!”
All are common statements I’ve heard from allies trying to assimilate and normalize the queer experience.  While I appreciate their efforts, they are false.  While the feelings of some do not define the beliefs of all LGBTQIA-identifying people, many queers do believe that there are some clothes that are just gayer than others.  Simmel might say queer clothes are a fashion that is a way to conform (to other LGBTQUIA people) and a way to individuality and self-expression (clearly determining themselves as a cohesive group, as different from straight people).

I interviewed two women who identify on the LGBTQUIA spectrum about how they get dressed for three standard events: going to class, going to a party, and hanging out with friends.  The first woman has a strong sense of style, and the second considers herself without an individual style, as she is “confused by fashion”.  Both women strongly agree with the idea that there is a “gay uniform”.  I investigated the difference between those with/without a sense of personal style, and how that interacts with their desire to conform to the “gay uniform”.

The first person I interviewed is my friend Julia, who is also a first-year.  She identifies as gay, and comes from an upper-middle class household in Scarsdale, NY.  Speaking from personal experience, suburban New York is a heteronormative haven for upper-middle class nuclear families.  There aren’t many gay uniform-ed people walking around Westchester or Long Island, so your fashion icons are well-dressed straight moms.  Or, if you’re a khakis and men’s button up kind of queer, then straight J Crew dads are also an option.  Really, though, it’s slim pickings.

Julia admits she took her style cues from her parents and her friends while growing up, and they are still a large part of wardrobe at Wellesley.  While showing me her “going to class” outfit, she joked that her style is that of a straight woman.  Basically, Julia outfits herself in hip styles from cheap, trendy stores like Topshop or H&M.  While she has a definitive style,  it is also shared by many straight college-aged women who want a more individualized look than their parents have, but still want that classic simple elegance. 

Here we can see Julia’s outfit for class, which consists of a scarf, a cardigan, a pair of leggings, and Converse sneakers.  We talked a bit about her tan cardi.  She found it while shopping at Old Navy, and it caught her eye as a comfortable piece of class-ready attire.  She tried it on it the neutral tan (tan goes with everything, so she only had to buy one cardi), and her mother told her to buy one size up because it looked too short for Julia’s nearly six foot frame.  Her mother is very tall, too, and thus was very important when Julia was learning how to dress; finding and fitting tall clothes is difficult, and must be learned.  The strong influence of her mother combined with her geography, has resulted in a very “straight” wardrobe for Julia.  She recognizes her conformity to suburban clothing ideals, and consciously works to look more gay.  As she is very comfortable with her style, and identity as a “rule finder”, Julia has figured out effective ways of weaving gay into her straight wardrobe.  She calls it, “lesbian preppy”. This familiarity with her role as a stylish rule finder allows her to adhere to the gay uniform. Although our uniform is counterculture, there are still rules; they’re just different from mainstream style. How we appear to the outside world is just as important as how we appear to other queers.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1W4TKOrI0un2801z3u9eVka39UPpGy9bC-t_M09D9sJ0/edit?usp=sharing

A tie on a female is a common indicator of queerness.  Julia has quite the array of ties, a few of which are lifted from her dad’s closet. She does not go shopping for ties, merely allowing them to meander into her life in different ways, since it is “awkward” for women to shop for ties.  The plaid one in the middle was thrifted, and Julia primarily describes it as “originally from H&M”.  Even when bought in an unconventional way, Julia still pushes to identify her clothing in acceptable rule finder terms, such as recognizable lifestyle brands (H&M).  She would use a tie to spice up a going to class outfit, but only as of last year when she and her friends started “Formal Thursdays”.  Since other girls, especially straight ones, were wearing ties, Julia felt better about wearing ties to her rather homogenous high school.  Ties are also a part of Julia’s going out attire, as she wore a tie and tuxedo jacket to her 18th birthday dinner.  However, as Julia does identify as a non-butch female, she was concerned with the femininity of the outfit and paired it with a pair of tight slacks and heels to “femme it up a little”.  Speaking to the power of a “gay uniform”, Julia says she found a sense of self, and also of community, in the tux and bow tie that allowed her to come out to parents while she was wearing it.  The outfit was originally a joke to just match with her friend Aron, but became a uniform with a distinct purpose as the night went on.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1HOberO6O61sk2xrtoJbZAFnaXBl76fvxZvno9WrwCY8/edit?usp=sharing

At Wellesley, however, Julia will gay up her outfit with ties, her Tevas, or a fleece, without thinking twice.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/10M0STVFK_13UaWTuc2Zdftfx5DIaW0EDHRR0rXr1ilQ/edit?usp=sharing

I also interviewed my girlfriend Caroline, who, on the other hand, struggles a bit more with fashion.  She’s a queer first-year currently from Baton Rouge, LA, after having moved frequently over the course of her life. While talking about shopping for clothes, Caroline said she usually goes with her mother, as she “cannot be trusted with fashion”.  Also, having been chided by friends for looking like a dyke the one time she attempted to dress in style, Caroline is done with fashion.  She now just tries to blend in with her style.  She dresses primarily for comfort, and what she tries to achieve with her going to class outfit is “avoiding being arrested for public indecency”.  Clothes are not a vehicle for self-expression for Caroline; she has tried fashion in the past but, “it went so terribly, I gave up”.  Her go-to look is a pair of skinny jeans that show off her calves, and she’ll wear them for a week without washing.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1LZyyVCGaH-dhV_Bxzk2cXMCKx5WwQq6SEjOcBdfmy6g/edit?usp=sharing

“I’m just trying to not be the worst dressed person.  I’m ok with being in the bottom 5th percentile, but as long as I’m not disgusting or drawing attention to myself, I don’t care”.

This will be paired with a baggy sweater, since not only is Caroline dressing for comfort and anonymity, she is also dressing for her size DD breasts.

“If you wear something baggy, you look fat. If you wear something tight, you’re a ‘slut’. I can’t win, so I just don’t care anymore”.

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1lNkweKPJ5ClO1F3_X0utcoWWvfseLke-UZ_PUQ_0_IE/edit?usp=sharing

Caroline does have some short shorts and spaghetti strap tank tops for going out at night, though.  She spent most of her time exploring going to clubs as a straight woman, so her few clothes for partying subscribe mostly to straight stereotypes.  However, when we go to the pub, it’s less about presenting a sexual identity and more about showing off physical assets (butt, breasts, legs), so she doesn’t really care if she doesn’t come off queer.  This was a similarity between Julia and Caroline.  Both agreed that an outfit is successful based on the amount of people who hit on you or dance with you, and by how many friends tell you that you look hot.  Caroline stated this concept in terms of the word “slut”, “I don’t want to look too slutty, or not slutty enough.  I aim for medium slut”.  Julia talked about the tightness of the clothes and the amount of cleavage shown, “Low cut, loose shirt; tight pants; and plenty of sparkles!” Even Julia, who knows how to conform to queer standards unlike Caroline who is still learning, does not present as overtly queer when going out.  There is the assumption, whether it’s true or false is unimportant in this study because it’s so widely believed, that queer women are attracted to the same things on a woman as a straight man, so there’s no need to have a separate wardrobe for straight clubs and gay clubs.

https://docs.google.com/a/wellesley.edu/document/d/1xEQX78FYj2Vt3CHEBQ4A3uMWt2eJYg9kWTlApNfOW7g/edit

https://docs.google.com/document/d/12Z2DZ9ajZMKLT0i3_gWsPfwBnuUjWcurULobNAIKT0o/edit?usp=sharing

Overall, I found that regardless of style, or lack thereof, the LGBTQIA-identifying individuals I interviewed all attempted to conform to at least one concept of queer fashion.  Even Caroline, who considers herself a newcomer to the LGBTQIA scene, is actively building her flannel collection for the day she attempts fashion again.  But, this time?  She’s doing it right, and she’s doing it queer.