Today in class with Chimuanya we reviewed the first draft of her essay.
First I asked her how she felt about her first draft. She responded that she felt her beginning was strong, but by the end had “run out of ideas.” My impressions mirrored her sentiment, and we talked about merging the last two paragraphs together to make one coherent paragraph, to make for a stronger finish.
She had clearly not proofread her draft, so I asked her to review the essay for grammatical errors. This allowed me to note which errors she was able to identify and fix herself, and which errors she did not pick up on due to unawareness of the grammar. For instance, we went over the difference between “it’s” (contraction) and “its” (possessive).
Then I went through my feedback with her in detail. I had spotted a hole in her argument, which I brought to her attention, and she orally articulated to me how she would address it in her writing. She understood well what I was saying, and described to me in detail how she would incorporate my feedback in approaching her second draft, which she will send to me by Thursday evening.
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