Ten years after graduating, my greatest post-Wellesley learning is: I’m not who I thought I was.
During my four years on campus, I was anything but Wendy Wellesley. I didn’t join a dozen clubs and committees. The whole “non ministrari sed ministrare” thing seemed a bit archaic. And unlike my classmates, I was not mapping out my future political career. Comparing myself to my peers, I decided that I was not a joiner, not service-oriented, and definitely not ambitious. And now I am working at a non-profit, climbing the ladder with an eye to further advancement, and serving on a number of boards in my spare time. Throw in my all-women book club and I’m living every Wellesley stereotype on record.
So what happened? I didn’t change: I’m just a polished version of college me. What changed is the context in which I live and work. Wellesley and the real work world have about as much in common as apples and elephants. Principles like hard work and self-reflection that are woven into the day-to-day at Wellesley are rare birds elsewhere. These underpinnings give you a great advantage in the working world, but you need to be aware of them before they can help you.
- Assume nothing. For years I assumed that my willingness to take on the tough project and my desire for increased responsibility was taken as read. Everyone wanted that, right? A boss finally explained to me that no, that isn’t an assumption managers make, and that if I’m ready for more I should say so. That goes for everything you take for granted at Wellesley: the people around you are making assumptions based on their own experiences, not yours.
- Go ahead and seize control. When I started working, I was hesitant to step up as a project leader because I didn’t have the work experience my colleagues did. I wasn’t even sure I wanted to be in charge: what if something went wrong? But after my sense of personal responsibility had me jumping in to rescue several near-disasters, I realized it was easier to volunteer to be in charge at the outset. The truth is most people will be grateful if you step up and offer to manage a leaderless project. And after four years at Wellesley, you have excellent project management skills, trust me.
- Don’t compare yourself to your classmates. Just because you haven’t cured cancer, joined the State Department, and adopted triplets doesn’t mean you’re not doing a great job at what you do. Every industry and job advances at a different pace. There will always be someone doing better and always someone doing worse. Be proud of where you are and the work you have done to get there.
Let your Wellesley experiences guide you, but don’t let them define you. I am excellent at my job, which involves budgets and goals in the millions. I also got a C+ in Microeconomics. Those disparate realities can and do co-exist. Don’t let Wellesley You limit future You: you have all the tools to do anything and everything.