A lofty goal is to excel at whatever it is we hope to achieve as human beings. If we want to be a trusted supervisor, a wonderful friend, a terrific employee, a beloved professor, etc., being mindful about the following common characteristics will help immensely:
- Open communication channels
- Positive attitude
- Reliably true to your word
- Being an active listener
If you are a good communicator, you actively encourage others to express their thoughts, as well as their feelings, with you. Having this style will allow others to know that they are included and that they are part of an important team. Giving others your attention will show that you have respect for them. Asking them how they are doing and caring about their responses will be an important component.
Having a positive attitude can be assisted by actively engaging in positive thinking. There is scientific data that backs up why the body responds well to it. We all feel worse when we put ourselves down and our stress levels go up. When you think about yourself and others in a positive light, you will attract people to you and your communication channels will improve. Your mind can choose to be optimistic about a situation and encourage others to do the same. Acknowledging several things for which you are grateful will help you realize that happiness can be achieved and steps can be taken for success.
When people trust you, they will want to come to you and discuss important matters. If you break your word, it is difficult to regain that trust. Trust engenders others to be actively involved in the relationship and there is a feeling of a shared purpose. People must earn trust, as it is not merely granted. Let others know that they can depend on you and that you are not hiding important information from them. Show that you are capable and always strive to be authentic. Being humble and vulnerable are important because the other person can see that you do not consider yourself above, but equal to, them.
Being an active listener does not mean that you are hearing the other person so that you can respond. It means that you are actually listening to them and, when it is your turn to speak, you can inquire further about what they just said. Letting them actually hear you summarize back what you heard will prove to them that you are listening closely and that you understood them. This not only builds trust but it also encourages more engagement in the conversation. Put your phone/computer away and look the other person in the eye. Show empathy where it is needed and be aware of how you are acting towards them. Active listening will help build and maintain strong relationships.
