Haley, 4/27/13:
Haley wrote the first draft of her third paper for this week’s meeting. I had only required her to make an outline and do some preliminary writing, but she was motivated and decided to write a complete first draft. The draft was a very solid start; it was easy to read and had a clear argument. She chose to write about a political neuroscience initiative rather than neuroscience research, so the paper was a bit of a style departure. Her writing seemed looser, in a good way, and she seemed to have enjoyed writing it. We discussed my comments on the paper for most of the meeting. One of two main problems was the length of her introduction; it took three pages to get to the thesis! We discussed the advantages of a shorter introduction (I used the “old movie with a very long intro” analogy- you wait so long for the plot to start and you don’t know what parts of the intro are important to remember.). I then helped her cut the three to four intro paragraphs down dramatically. She was able to cut down both unnecessary information and wordy sentences. The other main problem with the paper was the counterargument paragraph. All of the counterarguments were lumped in one paragraph with no analysis and the paragraph was not introduced as a counterargument paragraph. We discussed this problem at length, and she ultimately decided on a new paper organization. Finally, we went over the final assignment. She had a few questions but is feeling comfortable with the writing handbook assignment. She said that she may turn the handbook and her third paper in early. I told her that if she chooses to turn them in early, I will assign her short papers or thoughtletters for the remaining classes. Haley will write the final draft of her third paper for next week.
Maud, 4/27/13:
This week, Maud made an outline and did some preliminary writing for her third paper. She stated that she had some trouble with the assignment because she wasn’t sure what I was looking for, but I emphasized that this assignment was really for her. We discussed the outline and her plan for the paper for the majority of the meeting. Her thesis was a very broad question, so we spent quite a bit of time reviewing theses and arguments. She wrote out a rough new thesis which stated a solid argument. We then looked at a handout from Purdue OWL on successful theses and made sure her thesis was specific and debatable. We also spent some time discussing her possible paragraph organization. She planned to do some free writing on her own. Finally, we discussed her final assignment. I brought the questions for the handbook assignment and we discussed the questions. She was able to answer them, but stated that she would rather rework her previous papers. I was worried that she was choosing to rework the papers because she wasn’t clear on the questions, so I gave the handbook a real plug. She stated that she knew the concepts but was worried about writing her responses clearly. She will do a bit of both: she will rework one paper and two thoughtletters (possibly one- I will decide) and will use her cover letter to address some of the questions from the handbook assignment. I think that this assignment will be more comfortable for her, but will also allow her to reflect on some of the more concrete concepts she has learned. Maud will write the first draft of her third paper for next week.