How often have you read an email from a colleague that you and/or others misinterpreted? You might have wanted to respond by challenging the colleague or simply by writing back and asking for clarification. You wonder why the email was sent, rather than having a meeting where you all could have discussed the issue and observed the other’s demeanor, tone, and inflection. Why is it that people often hide behind emails, chats, and texts? I believe that COVID gave people permission to be more anonymous and less personal with their correspondence but now that it’s under control, you would think that we would want to – indeed crave – personal interactions and communications. What is the added value of these types of discussions?
It is easy to assume “bad intent” in a text or email because you don’t have the full picture or context of the message. One may react by questioning themselves or fearing that they have done something inferior, only to find out months later that everything was fine. A large percentage of a message from a person is found in their expression, voice, body language and additional information that is shared merely because you are meeting face-to-face and not just in short truncated messages like “thanks for the report,” “next meeting is Wednesday,” and “let’s work on that some more.” There is quite a lot there that possibly is not being said.
If you need to document a conversation, perhaps because it needs to be clear who will be doing what part of a project, then there is definitely a time and place for that. It can also be documented after a face-to-face meeting in order to get everyone on the same page about what you had covered in your live meeting. However, be cautious about substituting valuable in-person meetings with emails and chats, regardless of how tempting it may be.
Another big reason to have face-to-face communications is that it builds community much more effectively than written ones. You tend to learn a little more about your colleagues and show that you care about them and their lives. It also allows you to share a bit about yourself and let them know that you aren’t just “all business,” but that you are also a human being. Sharing a funny story about taking your dog out for a walk can go a long way in breaking down barriers and showing a real part of yourself.
The next time you are tempted to send out a chat message or a long, dense email, think about whether it would be better if you met in person and discussed the issue. If nothing else, it might be a good experiment and allow you to test out different methods of communication. You will likely find that it was well worth the extra effort you all took to meet in person.
